Monday, January 21, 2013

Travelogue Florida: Disneyworld


DisneyWorld includes four theme parks, Downtown Disney, a boatload of hotels and resorts, a wedding pavilion, golf courses, and a transportation system (bus and monorail) that connects most of it together.

It's massive.

If you're staying at a Disney resort or hotel, you can use Disney Magical Express to get to and from the airport. It's a tour bus with little tvs that will tell you about some of the theme park attractions. I had all carry-on, but they'll take your checked bags directly to your room when you arrive. Oh, and Southwest flyers - they'll print your boarding pass for ya'. Oh yes. Disney knows what it do.

I stayed at the Old Key West Resort, a collection of condos and vacation homes surrounding a golf course. It's so big, I was driven to my room in the concierge golf cart. There are several bus stops in the resort, so when you want to get to Downtown Disney or EPCOT center, just go to the nearest bus stop and wait for your bus. Which is like riding a city bus. Only it's clean. And they call it a motor coach.

EPCOT
I spent most of my time on the science-y side (there's also a side with country-themed pavilions) After two rides (an exploration of human's innovation, narrated by Dame Judi Dench and an ode to imagination featuring Eric Idle), I thought, The British have invaded. Again.

But then I went on a space mission ride narrated by Gary Sinise. There are two versions – one that doesn't spin (green) and one that does (orange). The orange version can be so intense for some, there are barf bags. On the ride.

Despite having eaten half a pretzel, I took the orange.

Though I didn't feel any spinning, I did, however, follow the directions – keep your eyes open and face forward. Fighting my initial impulse to close my eyes probably made all the difference. Super fun. I recommend it.

The fireworks show, however, was disappointing. Not the fireworks themselves – they were cool. But there was a giant globe that seemed to float in air (cool) and stop at point that was difficult to see from where we were standing (not cool). If you're going to tout your show as being visible from all vantage points, then please make sure all vantage points are equally spectacular.

After the initial barrage of fireworks (and fire – mmm, heat!) there was a lot of talk. Something something something, we're all human so we shouldn't hate each other, something something something, images on the cool globe keep changing something something something ooh, fireworks, more talking, peace on earth, something something something hey the globe is opening! That's cool. More fireworks are they going to bring back the fire again? 'cause I'm cold. More talking something something something fireworks fireworks the end.

Underwhelming. Perturbingly uncharacteristic for Disney.

Disney Hollywood Studios
I saw three of the six live shows – Fantasmic (basically the same as what you see in Disneyland), Indiana Jones Epic Stunt Spectacular (not bad) and Lights, Motors, Action! Extreme Stunt Show (my favorite). It was all about stunt car driving. They literally burn rubber, and they show you some of the tricks. Geek!

Only go on the Studio Backlot Tour if you need to take up 40 minutes until your next thing. The best thing about it is the end, where you can go into the AFI Film Institute thingy and see costumes and props from various movies.

Walt Disney, One Man's Dream, an interesting movie that's not too rah rah. I wanted to get my hands on classic Mickey Mouse cartoons after I had seen it.

The Great Movie Ride puts favorite movie scenes and genres on animatronic display, with some bearable cheese from the guides. I was pleased that the Wizard of Oz Munchkin Land display included the frowny one from the Lollipop Guild.

Star Tours is always lovely, we skipped the Tower of Terror, and Rock 'n' Roller Coaster Starring Aerosmith is, literally, a blast.

If I ever go back to Disney Hollywood Studios, I want to eat at the 50's Prime Time Café. The Dick Van Dyke show was on a black & white tv in the waiting area. And to the left was an area that looked like a 1960s family room. Totally geeked on the décor.

Magic Kingdom
For those of you who know DisneyLand by heart, Magic Kingdom will throw you for a bit of a loop. Things are in the wrong place, or not there at all. And there are things that are there that aren't in DisneyLand.

Now, the Lands are all in the right place. But there's no corn dog cart. There's no Scary Adventures of Snow White, Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, or Matterhorn. It's Prince Charming's Carousel (not King Arthur's), Cinderella's Castle (not Sleeping Beauty's), the Tomorrowland Speedway (not Autotopia), and Liberty Square (not New Orleans' Square). The Winnie the Pooh ride is in Fantasyland (not Frontierland), and Pirates of the Caribbean is in Adventure Land (not New Orleans' - er - Liberty Square). A bit disconcerting.

But they still have the Swiss Family Robinson Tree House, the People Mover, and Walt Disney's Carousel of Progress (which I didn't get to go on, but will go back to Florida just so I can understand why my friend thinks it's so horrendous. I predict I'll love it.)

They're adding a Snow White Mine Ride (rollercoaster) and some sort of Rapunzel thing (we saw the tower). Oh, and Peter Pan has fast passes. Genius. Whadup, DisneyLand?

Most importantly, there is a place in Liberty Square that sells funnel cake. I know, right?

Animal Kingdom (Resort)
We had dinner at Sanaa, in the Animal Kingdom resort. While waiting for your table, you can go out on the patio and watch animals chilling. Wildebeasts and warthogs and what not.

The food is Indian-inspired. The waiter asks if anyone has food allergies, and then the chef comes to discuss with the allergy prone what can and cannot be eaten.

It's a cool place. The food is good. They sing the Stevie Wonder version of Happy Birthday and know how to end it. They make sure the food doesn't kill you. They have five types of Rooibus tea. And you can watch animals while you're waiting for your table. Using night goggles when it's dark.

Yep. I need to start planning my next trip.

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